my new best subway story - 2004-03-06 2:58 p.m.

last night i went to meet jnet at a show. on the subway there three girls got on at dundas west station, all completely plastered, all about 16 years old.

after about a minute, one of them passes out and smashes her head off the floor, and promptly shits her pants and starts puking. the other two girls think this is the funniest thing in the world and start dancing and singing around one of those aluminum poles, may-pole style.

they're both shitfaced, so they fall over hard, and someone activates the passenger alert strip.

the ttc emergency guy comes in to find the two girls screaming at the tops of their lungs about how wasted they are(one with her pants around her ankles), and the third girl propped up against the seats, sort of oozing and bubbling with puke with her head lolling to the side.

he makes them stay on the train, but at the next stop(bathurst) they decide to try to drag their friend off, and succeed in getting the doors slammed on her hard enough to make her start puking again.

they drop her and reel away, screaming "EEEWWWW GRRROSSS!! SHE TOTALLY PUKED ON ME!!!!! TOTALLY!!!! AAAAGGHHH!!!" until the ttc guy comes and screams at them some more and makes them leave the train.

i just kind of feel bad, cause it was only about 9 at night, and there were a lot of parents and small children on when this happened.

if i saw a teenage girl shit her pants when i was 6, i'd be a different person now.

the show was fucking amazing, it was the golden dogs and el torpedo. both bands ruled, one of jnet's friends picked my nose, and then i left early.

p.s. here's is a picture of me in residence. it's a bad picture of me, but i sure do miss that shirt.